Invention: Similar to Obama's use of it--make a statement, back it up with a story. Arrangement: Smooth transitions--everything seemed to be in place. Style: Don't make disclaimers before your speech. It hurts your ethos. :) Memory: Stumbled over your words a few times, but overall, good. Delivery: You looked and sounded a little tired, which I had oodles of grace for, especially since it's an early class.
Great speech, Justin! I loved how you brought your own story into the beginning, added the stories of Columbus and your personal story of the college-hopeful, Johnny. Could add more emphasis on key words and added more hand gestures. Overall, great job! :)
Justin—you might not want to refer President Obama as ‘Barak’ (which you did once near the beginning). Other than that, though, really good speech! I particularly liked your beginning and how you tied in your life story to your speech.
haha, awesome hair, for starters, on video today, and like Dr. C said, very good use of stories in the speech. Personally, I thought the delivery was excellent, and your ethos was really strong and a great way to begin similar to Obama, so that's great for style Referring to him as Barack made it more personal and I think the Democratic party would approve, highly. Arrangement was very very nice. Memory, good, but your mic cut out once and it was sort of confusing as to whether you or the computer made a mistake. But you can't control it so it's totally not your fault. =D Nice job of playing devil's advocate, by the way... Pretty amazing!
Invention: Similar to Obama's use of it--make a statement, back it up with a story.
ReplyDeleteArrangement: Smooth transitions--everything seemed to be in place.
Style: Don't make disclaimers before your speech. It hurts your ethos. :)
Memory: Stumbled over your words a few times, but overall, good.
Delivery: You looked and sounded a little tired, which I had oodles of grace for, especially since it's an early class.
Great speech, Justin! I loved how you brought your own story into the beginning, added the stories of Columbus and your personal story of the college-hopeful, Johnny. Could add more emphasis on key words and added more hand gestures. Overall, great job! :)
ReplyDeleteJustin—you might not want to refer President Obama as ‘Barak’ (which you did once near the beginning). Other than that, though, really good speech! I particularly liked your beginning and how you tied in your life story to your speech.
ReplyDeletehaha, awesome hair, for starters, on video today, and like Dr. C said, very good use of stories in the speech. Personally, I thought the delivery was excellent, and your ethos was really strong and a great way to begin similar to Obama, so that's great for style Referring to him as Barack made it more personal and I think the Democratic party would approve, highly.
ReplyDeleteArrangement was very very nice.
Memory, good, but your mic cut out once and it was sort of confusing as to whether you or the computer made a mistake. But you can't control it so it's totally not your fault. =D Nice job of playing devil's advocate, by the way... Pretty amazing!